My First Time Getting High

My first time getting high on Marijuana was weird. For like a year or so, from sophomore to junior year, I would smoke everyday. But, I didn’t know how to inhale, so I was smoking it like a cigar.

I actually had a weed vaporizer called the Flowermate v5.0s. I would vape it in the bathroom of my house or in the shed.

After a year and a half of nothing happening, I genuinely believed I actually was getting high, because I made a placebo and pretended I was chill afterwards.

Then one day I vaped it in my shed. I remember making a point to inhale it into my lungs. That fucking thing hit like a truck! I remember doing this weird thing where I got high then would focus all my attention on a sound in the distance. I remember doing that had a weird effect on my cognition.

But, I got too high. I remember getting so scared and going to my bed. I remember feeling like I was dying. My heart was racing. I was staring at the blinking idle power indicator light on my monitor.

If I focused on the light, I could make the time it took to blink take longer, so I believed I had the power to slow down time, and that freaked me out.

I texted my stoner friend asking if he thinks my weed was laced, and he said no and just started laughing. He just assumed I was a lightweight and that it was my first time genuinely getting high.

So I just rhode it out. I remember seeing my grandmother touching the flowers in our front yard, which weirded me out because she never does that.

Overall, nothing too crazy of a trip in retrospect, but in the moment, I was having a panic attack.

I continued to smoke for years on from there. I just got used to the high and instead of it being ‘trippy’ it mostly just turned into relaxation and euphoria.

Unfortunately though, there’s always a trade off. Years and years of hiding in my room smoking lead to more anti-social behavior. I socialized a lot less and lost a lot of friends. Being out of my room caused me to overthink all the time. My family always smelled it and would urge me to stop.

I’d vape a Pax 2 in my bedroom everyday after school ( high school ), go to lacrosse, come back, eat dinner, play League of Legends, then vape the Pax 2 at night before going to sleep.

I am genuinely surprised that my work ethic was that good even though I was getting fried everyday. I am surprised that I made it to Lacrosse practice pretty much everyday, because I would think that if I got stoned everyday that i’d want to skip practice, but I guess I didn’t?

I also must mention that once I started smoking consistently, I started sleeping in school a lot more.

I was also REALLY bad at lacrosse too lol. The only thing I was good at was bouncing the ball off the wall and catching it. When it came to having to perform ( in a game or in a real life drill at practice ), I was really bad lol.

In the games, I would legit be in a 1v1 with a guy who had the ball, and I would spaz out and slap his helmet with my stick or do something else that got me a penalty.

I legit think every time I actually was in a game, within 1 – 5 minutes i’d get a penalty and have to go to the timeout place lol. I was a defenseman.

I honestly think I never did well ever, unfortunately.

My coach and my teammates really liked me though, and they complimented how I was funny and always smiling and having a good time. But I still never did well unfortunately.

I quit senior year because I wanted to save myself the embarrassment of never being put in the varsity games and looking sad. It was a weird situation though. When I started Lacrosse my senior year, I was smoking everyday and actually inhaling. I went from 200 pounds to 160. So I came back to lacrosse much skinnier than usual and had a ‘new’ mental.

I remember the first day of practice, I was going so hard, and loving what it felt like to be skinny. But I didn’t know how to manage my newfound energy, so I was running as hard as I could and not caring. I ended up throwing up. Then I just quit, realizing I’d probably never be put in a varsity game.

Then one day I micro-dosed LSD on the same day of wrestling tryouts, weirdly. That gave me energy and I walked to the high school and signed up.

That was one of the best choices of my life, because I was actually pretty decent at wrestling. The good thing about wrestling is that you don’t really need good technique you just need good athleticism, a strong mental, good stamina, and perseverance. Oh and strength too.

I think I went like 4 and 2 and we won states and I got a championship ring.

The practices were hell. Miles and miles of running and constant sparring. But it was worth it.